Your Kisses are Wasted on Me (Open)

[amandalarsen]

Your kisses are wasted on me
Your kisses are wasted on me
(Boy)
I don't love you, you don't make me smile
For a while

The dorms were empty and silent for the remainder of the day. Amanda sat by her window, overlooking the distant mountains as the sun set this evening. Her homework laid still on her made bed, few wrinkles in the sheets from where she sat and shifted while finishing up her essays for classes. Dreading all the work that needed to be done, Amanda just couldn't concentrate. She couldn't.

Shades of red, orange, and yellow distantly mesh in the sky as the sun slowly sunk behind the mountains. The landscape beginning to turn black; silhouette shadows as the sun leaves this side of the world. Shades of blue and purple descended on these bright colors, soon blanketing the whole sky as far as her sapphire eyes could see.

And still her homework laid cold on her bed, untouched for several minutes.

Amanda finally tore her eyes away from the window she looked through. Nothing else to watch, nothing else to distract her. But she didn't feel the urge to finish up her last essay for the night. Instead, as she stood up from the window sill she sat by, she slipped on a pair of slippers and left her dorm. The stairwell to the main common room creaked, indicating another restless Hufflepuff to join the others.

And she still felt unsatisfied. Undecided. Blank.

She didn't stay long in the common room, leaving the others to their work and games. Whereas she, well, she had to find something to do or go somewhere to fulfill her mood tonight. Amanda had too much in her mind that she wasn't sure what she'd do as she roamed these empty halls. Dark, shadowy, and yet comforting. With each window she passed, she could see the moon begin to rise over the sky.

Pale moonlight. It was these nights she missed being with him. Just the comfort of another soul who cared for her. But memories of the past faded, as well as their relationship, and it was just friends. They were just friends.

Her steps grew hollow, and her feelings turned bitter. Whereas her heart, her heart remained colder.

(Boy)
Get out of my face
(Boy)
I'm gonna catch and chase some other guy
Who I might like

Lips pursed to thin white slits, refusing to say a word, refusing to reply to a student who passed her by. She didn't have the voice to speak right now. Also, she didn't have the heart. (Boy) Get out of my face.

Obviously life was no cabaret. And she could not escape reality. Evidently, Amanda was going through a phase. It had to be a phase of selfishness. But what if she wasn't selfish? What if she was just feeling alone? Perhaps depressed? No, you can't be. Your friends have not left you. And your newer ones are beginning to realize the real you. The fun you. The friendly part of you.

And she still felt unsatisifed. Undecided. Alone.

Shivers ran down her spine and her body ached for some unknown reason. Amanda finally left the hallways, entering somewhere she hadn't expected. The nil light played tricks to her eyes, without even thinking about using her wand, but she was outside. Yet she was still within the castle walls.

And you might cry half the time
(And you don't know, no you don't know it)
And you might try to hold my hand again
(No, you don't know it)

A soft sigh escaped her lips as her sapphire eyes glanced around. The scent of flowers filled her lungs. Sweet and intoxicating. Her hand finally gripped her wand, and she murmured 'Lumos' to finally get a better look of her surroundings. A burst of bright light extruded from the end of her wand, and then dimmed.

The Enchanted Gardens. No memories filled her mind here. She shared none with anyone here. So it was, for once, peaceful.

She stepped forth on a path, walking around, and figuring where she might go from here. Amande felt different, and for once, her mind cleared of all the rough patches that prevented her from having a untroubled evening.

Calm and finally at rest, she finds a soft patch of grass beneath a small tree to sit on. At least she was safe here and unnoticed. Her wand rested on her stomach as she laid back, her arms cushioning her head, while she gazed up at the stars that began to sparkle across the dark sky.

Your kisses are wasted on me
Your kisses are wasted on me
(Boy)
You better hear me clear
(Boy)
I want you out of here
Don't send me wild
You're just a child

You're just a child

[nathanielhaake]

The nights grew cold and lonesome as Nathaniel laid back in his dorm. Staring up at the ceiling as his mind constantly played tricks with him. Though his voice didn't invade his mind.

No more Herpo...

That is all he could revel in. No more Herpo. He didn't have the dark wizard in his body anymore, controlling him, taking over his whole soul. And he felt at peace, free, and still alone. His royal blue orbs slowly saw darkness as his lids closed over, comforting him as the sleep lulled in his mind. But he was itching to do something, to go out there, to do something for once in his life that he could look back on.

Nathaniel remembered all that has happened now that his memory returned to him. A lot of last term was rather depressing. And he needed to do something to surpress them. Something he could be happy with. It was a mystery to him where he wanted to go or do. But his eyes opened and he looked straight up at the ceiling.

And it was silent. So silent that you could hear the wind whisper through these castle walls.

He hoisted himself up on his bed, glancing down at his pajamas. Nathaniel was ready for bed, a bit too early, but he managed to finish up what homework he had left. Or at least attempt to. Slipping on a pair socks and then his converse shoes, Nathaniel put on his pair of black framed glasses, and his feet padded out of the dormitory.

The common room was practically empty, usual, the students always went their own way. Not that I mind. Just less people I have to see. And that, Nathaniel was thankful for. His house was a bunch of nitwits, but he was one like all. Out the common room and in to the halls, Nathaniel crept closely against the castle walls. His hand clutched to his wand behind his back.

Not sure where he was going, he followed down the stairwells to a pair of feet that was ahead of him. All he could see was a flash of her blonde hair.

Long, beautiful blond hair.

Only a little glimpse and this stunning beauty had caught Nathaniel. So he crept, quietly, silently, and cunningly down the stairs and through the hallways. Nathaniel watched as she entered a tunnel, which he knew led out to the Enchanted Garden, and followed closely behind. As the moonlight got caught in her hair, he noticed those striking blue eyes of hers.

Amanda Larsen

And it's been a while. A long while since he's talked to her. Classes not included, but he missed spending time with his good friend. He missed spending time with Alessa too. Now that his memory returned, he missed the two a lot. And Xiomara too. Nathaniel followed through the portal and into the dark garden. The only visible light, besides the starry sky, was her wand.

She laid there like a monument. A beauty in marble stone. Peaceful.

He crept closer to her, quietly, and silently. Taking his wand out from behind his pocket, he muttered the lumos spell. Pointing his wand at the Hufflepuff, who laid on the ground, he grinned. "What's a Goonie doing out here alone?"

[[OOC: Haha, I'm trying to attempt this long post thing.]]

[amandalarsen]

Silence. Serene silence comforted the Hufflepuff as she laid there. Peace. Calm. Alone. So many can describe this moment as she looked straight at the sky. It was so beautiful. Star gazing alone for the first time this term. The Victory ball not included since she spent the night with a bickering couple, well friends, Lillian and Shayne.

And I love nights like these where it's so quiet.

She loved it so much that she stayed in her spot, unmoved, and smiling to the sky. Smiling as if it was meant only for the heavens above. And the stars spoke back to her, brightly flashing, and sparkling like champagne.

These nights I can cherish... alone.

Her sapphire eyes closed, listening to her surroundings, only the wind whipping through her blonde tendrils. The sound of lush green foliage rustling against each other. Amanda sighed happily, letting her wand fall to her side, only now illuminating her face. She loved spending this night alone. Just by herself so that she had no other distraction to ruin this night.

However, there was a disturbance far off near the entrance she had entered minutes ago. Her eyes opening and looking around. But all she could see was that shadowy figure. A lurker. Someone who had been following her down the halls. Prefects. They're drawn to you like moths to a lightbulb or flies to a pie. She frowned.

It would have been perfect.

Though, to her surprise, as a wand pointed toward her face, she saw him. And her face brightened in the light at the end of his wand. Him... Hoisting herself up from the soft turf, a giggle surpassed her lips. "This goonie felt like having the night off. So she decided to come and enjoy the starry sight." Pulling onto the cuff of his sleeve, she grinned.

"Join me?" Amanda kept tugging at his sleeve.

[nathanielhaake]

And the sky was falling down on us.

There were no other means for his visit in the enchanted garden. Just the curiousity that struck him when he found her roaming the halls. Creeping past those portraits, and Prefects who were on duty for the night. But she slipped through their fingers like silk. So smooth, yet so noticable. And Nathaniel couldn't take his eyes off of her.

He smiled as she noticed his presence; however, feeling sad that she moved. It was like he wanted to remember this moment. Just watching how beautiful she looked on the grassy floor. And she was like porcelain. Her skin radiated in the nil moonlight, but she had this eerie glow around her. Innocent.

She looked so innocent just sitting there and it made me smile.

She made his smile, reserved only for her. And he couldn't run now. Amanda figured him out and would likely not take no for an answer. Then again, Nathaniel didn't want to leave. No, I want to stay where with here. She's got me already. She has him by the sleeve.

His eyes looked down at her and her sapphire eyes stared back. She was determined, he felt it at her tugging, and he couldn't help but laugh. "Nice one." And still there was that nagging awkward feeling when he's around her. Like things from the past were finally catching up with him.

I let you go. Fingers barely touching and you slipped. Slipped out of my reach.

And she was gone. Gone from his life that he once hated. Herpo... It was because of him that he could never feel complete. Not even with Amanda. And now, it was different. His feelings were different. She was his friend, a good friend, like Alessa. But when does friendship turn to something more? When do you start to regret ever breaking up?

Because of her...

Nathaniel was trapped within his own swirl of regretable decisions. Never knowing if his feelings for another were true. But with her, Amanda, he felt at ease. His mind cleared and he finally took a seat beside her. "Alright. I'll join you on one condition. If you would stop tugging on my sleeve." He laughs. "You might stretch the threads."

Though he didn't want her to stop. No, he wanted her to continue.

It was like that first day they met. All over again, and he felt different. Incomplete and a little empty. Something just kept nagging him, tugging, and indirectly moving his thoughts toward Amanda.

Her... you never really were good enough for her. And yet I'm here.

"So how have you been?"

[amandalarsen]

((OOC: Pfft, looks like you perfected the style quickly. xP))

And I try... and I try... and I try

She didn't believe in fairytales after Nathaniel. Whereas Tristam was a distant Prince, out of reach, out of bounds for Amanda to touch. He left her, unanswered, and unaware of his disappearances. Slightly hearbroken, but still strong, he failed her and she never wanted to look back again. He didn't deserve her and she didn't deserve him.

Nathaniel. The one guy she let slip through her hands, but it wasn't meant to be. She enjoyed his company, loved his whole being, and wished she had never attempted more than what they had before. Their relationship grew; however, stronger and more defined as the bestest friendship she has ever had in her life, barring her parents and siblings.

I loved you because you loved me. Kiss me, hug me, and squeeze me tight my friend.

Eyes glistened as the stars reflected in those sapphire orbs of hers. Her fingers slipped from his sleeve, now grasping her wand, and laying it on her lap. She wondered, often she did wonder, if things would have been different between the both of them if Herpo wasn't present in his body. And what would happen if Herpo had taken over?

No, she liked Nathaniel more than ever, loved him like a brother. Though feelings, those inconsistent feelings, often confused her and she wasn't always sure of herself around him.

You were my sweetest downfall, I loved you first.

Her lips curled upward as he joined next to her on the ground. She had stopped tugging moments ago, just under that 'one' condition, and wrapped her arms around his one arm so that she could be closer toher. And leaning her head on his shoulder, her long blonde wavy tendrils fell over her shoulders. "I'll stop." She murmurs as her sapphire eyes look up to his royal blue ones.

"I've been swell. Classes are taking a lot of my time, especially the homework the professors assign. It is ridiculous, but I try my best." She teased as she poked the top of Nathaniel's nose with her wand.

And I miss being in your arms and the times we've spent together laughing. Will you be... will you still be mine?

A sigh escaped her pink dry lips as her eyes down-casted to the green turf below them. It wasn't like old times. Between them. And she missed how they were so quirky together. But can they still work on it? Can they just be the good ol' Nathaniel and Amanda? The Goonies! If only Alessa were here...

"And what has been up with you Nate.. the Great!" She grinned.

[nathanielhaake]

Don't stop. Please don't stop.

Lowering his wand to the ground, Nathaniel smiled faintly, distantly as he has always done. It's like he could never really be truthful with his friends, not even Alessa, not even her. But maybe he could change. Afterall, he was free, free from him. And now that he was besider her, he felt careful. Why careful when she's just Amanda.

He loved her, he loved her as much as he loves Alessa and Xiomara. Life seemed so complicated, even without the three. What sort of situation has he gotten himself in? Why couldn't he sort out his feelings anymore?

Because Herpo cannot invade your mind anymore. He's not longer there to pick and choose.

It's not like Nathaniel asked alot in life. He loved being free, but he felt... empty. A part of him felt unfinished now that Herpo was gone. And this made him think of his parents. How he left them to go to Hogwarts in such a rush. He left them on a bad note. 'I don't ever want to see you again!' It's what troubled his mind for the past few days.

Nathaniel looked to Amanda and those beautiful blue sparkling eyes that he's gazed into numerous times. Those eyes that had made him falter at the first time in the tower. And his gaze trailed down to the very tip of her pointy nose. Though below her nose were those pink plush lips. Lips of sin that he's kissed so many times and... missed.

She looked so beautifully flawless, just sitting there, innocent and yet quirky. He loved her, but he loved her in a way that couldn't compare to true love, passionate love. The type of love that two souls share as one. But the time he has spent with Amanda were the best. And he missed those lips pressing against his. He was tempted to kiss them, but instead, he bit down on his lips to prevent him from leaning over.

Lips... lips of an angel.

"That's good to hear." His head nodded thoughtfully, but he realized that he had been zoning out once she poked his nose with her wand. A laugh left his lips as he looked down at the grass. She might have caught him day dreaming, but it was her own fault. Damnit, why did he have to feel this way? Amanda is far from his reach, and he was still confused about his feelings. In time... I'll know what I want.

Lifting his gaze to meet with Amanda's, a smile graced his lips. "I've been good. Busy training and catching up with the work. The same ol'same." His arm nudged her own. "Amanda... I feel that I've kept too quiet about things. You know? My.. odd behavior and disappearances last term and over the break." He finally held onto her hand for comfort.

"I.. I feel that I should be truthful with you as I should also be with Alessa. I'm.. I'm just afraid of how you would react? I haven't told Alessa yet, and I dread it, but I want to tell you first." His hold on her hand gripped firmly. "Just please don't tell Alessa and please don't judge me or look at me any different. I'll tell Alessa when the time is right. Okay?"

[amandalarsen]

The darkness surrounded them as he lowered his wand to the floor. Amanda's had diminished once Nathaniel arrived earlier, and she didn't think to relight her wand for the both to have something to look at. Instead, she wanted this, she wanted it to be dark for the two. She felt safe that way, knowing she wouldn't be caught seeing him, if she stared.

And in the back of her mind, she felt a nagging twinge, something that wanted her to press up against Nathaniel, hug him, and kiss him. But she felt that the urge to do so would change everything and what they needed most was to get back on track.

Friends... always and forever.

They were just friends now and they needed to stay that way. Her eyes looked to his silhoutted head and she smiled. It was like she could see the lines of his lips, nose, and eyes behind those black framed glasses of his. This was the first they had spent outside under the stars together, and she enjoyed it with the company of Nathaniel. Her friend.

When does this longing feeling for Nathaniel end? Amanda let the best damn thing out of her life because of her confused feelings. There was Tristam and then Nathaniel. One who pulled her forward while the other away. Nathaniel was so selfish around her during last term, and Tristam... he kept her on her toes, wishing and hoping. But where did it all go wrong?

Suddenly the ache of her heart prang with every beat against her chest. It was that same old trap that she had warned other girls about in the gossip column. How Tristam stole hearts and kisses. He definitely stole hers for a moment, but she felt more safer with Nathaniel, knowing he'd care about her more than Tristam did. Because if Tristam cared, he would be around, and right here with her.

Her fingers reached out to find Nathaniel's hand, and grasped, intertwining her fingers with his own as she leaned her head against his soft shoulder. And for a moment, she felt peace, and her mind was clear of all the troubles she brewed in mind for herself. And the images disappeared with every breath she took and every one she could feel from Nathaniel.

White lies. Just little white lies that were meant to unfold sooner or later.

Sapphire orbs glanced to Nathaniel's royal blue ones, her hand now grasping to her wand and lighting up a pale yellowish ball. She was concerned about what he was going to unfold the past to her. And she was frightened at the same time. She nodded her head, understanding, while also gripping his hand.

'I.. I feel that I should be truthful with you as I should also be with Alessa. I'm.. I'm just afraid of how you would react? I haven't told Alessa yet, and I dread it, but I want to tell you first.'

She blinked with a blank expression on her face. Afraid? Afraid that she might think of him different apart from last term and break? Afraid that she might never talk to him again after she's learned what he is going to tell her? And afraid that if he told her first, she would rant, and go off and find Alessa to tell her exactly what he had told her.

"Nathaniel, I promise I won't tell her. And I won't judge you or think any different than how I do now. You know me better than to do so." Lifting his hand close to her, she pressed her soft pink lips against his knuckles. "I'm here to listen and understand what is it that has happened Nathaniel. Alright?" She smiled faintly as both her hands now held his one hand. "Tell me."

And it shouldn't be you who is afraid, but me...

[nathanielhaake]

He waited for some sort of rise out of Amanda. Just for thinking the way that he did. And he felt horrible for keeping such a secret away from her and Alessa. Not telling them at first hand when he should have terms ago. But how could he? How could he involve them if Herpo threatened their life? Taunting him and telling him the details of how he would slowly torture the girls until their last gasping breath.

But he's gone. Herpo is gone now and Nathaniel was free. And his friends were free too. Alessa, Amanda, Xiomara, and Alexander. He hadn't even come around to tell Alexander all of what happened. Though he was ever so thankful that Alex helped him last term, through thick and thin. He looked to him like an older brother, just how he looked up to Brandon Corbett.

And if you're lost
You can look
And you will find me
Time after Time

His hand lifted from the very spot he relaxed it within Amanda's grasp, and to her lips, he felt those sweet soft lips across his knuckles. Kissing them softly, meaningfully. They sent shivers through his body. Making him feel less inclined to tell her of what happened, but he had to, he had to do this for her. Amanda was just too kind, too caring, that he couldn't lie anymore.

And reassured by her words, he smiled faintly, still firmly grasping onto her hands. Though that spot she had kissed, still left a tingly trail across his knuckles, hoping that it would never fade away.

You are the most beautiful thing that I have seen.

"Thank you Amanda." He nodded his head, leaning in, and gently leaving a small friendly kiss on the side of her temple. "I wasn't as innocent as you or Alessa might have thought. No one really knew about this curse on my soul besides myself, my parents, the ghost of Griselda, Herpo, Brandon Corbett, and Sarah Winthrop."

Until now of course. The line continues.

"I never really wanted anyone to get involved besides those who knew about it at first hand. It's a curse in which Herpo tries to overtake every first born son in his line of each generation. I'm... his descendant. This has been happening for centuries Amanda." His royal blue eyes looked skyward and a soft sigh escaped his lips.

He was retelling the story, like he had told Xiomara at quidditch practice, again. "I was born with the curse of course. Herpo, if you don't know, is a dark wizard who made the first Basilisk. And a very powerful friend to Salazar Slytherin. I'm just bound to that house as anyone in my future line will be. So I've suffered, ever since, and it became worser last term. Amanda, that is why I've changed so much last term, and I never meant to hurt you. Or anyone for that matter."

[amandalarsen]

Amanda had to brace herself, just in case she would be given some information she wished not to hear. But this is Nathaniel, her Nathaniel, and she would listen like any good best friend would do in this situation. And so she waited, waited for him to answer her back. To give her something to understand. And to finally recognize what had been bothering Nathaniel this whole time since they've known each other.

The first thing she heard, and tried to understand, was this curse he mentioned. Only several people knew, those being close to Nathaniel. Those names, at least two of them, sounded oddly familiar. This Brandon Corbett and Sarah Ann Winthrop. Former students. Remember Amanda? They were in Slytherin, seventh years when you were a first year. Finally she realized why they sounded familiar. Their names under their portraits in the graduate hall.

Finally she heard his name, Herpo, the one who had been infiltrating Nathaniel's body. And it was no wonder Nathaniel acted like he did last term. He was so distant with her and yet so weird. One moment he can be affectionate, and the next, he could be so moody and sulky. He was a dark wizard, one who poisoned Nathaniel, and had ruined the best of their relationship. Then again, Amanda wasn't ready for commitment, not when she liked another, Tristam Lane.

Listening as Nathaniel spoke of Herpo and the traditional values of how he tries to overtake every first born son in his line, she felt a tad bit worrisome, wondering if Nathaniel's next in line child would too be possessed. And now recognizing that Nathaniel, had indeed, changed, she wondered if things would ever turn back the same between them. It's felt awkward at first, but she couldn't have the same feelings for him like she had before. She couldn't kiss him like she's done every night.

Another name came to mind, Salazar Slytherin, and things just seemed like a coincidence. His family came from a long line of Slytherins because of Herpo, and his future is bound to that house. Amanda gulped, still keeping her grip on his hand, and listened more intently than before. She didn't like to hear that he suffered, and she wondered if she had made anything worse by nagging him constantly before.

Her sapphire orbs searched his face, so much movement, so much emotions could be read across every line. And she finally breathed in, able to catch her breath, and speak. "I... I'm so sorry Nathaniel. Surely if there was anything I could have done, I would have. But it seems like you've made the right choice so far, right? To... to save us from harm? But... how did you get rid of him Nathaniel?"

[nathanielhaake]

"Of course I made the right choice Amanda. I couldn't have anyone harming you or Alessa... or anyone for that matter. Not even myself." He responded to her, noting how fearful she looked as he gazed into those sapphire orbs of hers. Nathaniel wouldn't let any harm come to Amanda or Alessa. He couldn't stand for it and he'd kill for their safety.

What had happen for him to get rid of Herpo? It was all a mess, his memory, but at least he regained his concious. And the worst part was being submerged in water. There were nights where he felt like he was suffocating underwater. The image of Brandon's face hovering over him, holding him down, and trying with all his might to fight against Nathaniel.

"I'll get there in a moment Amanda. You just have to understand the backstory first. See, Herpo would have been powerful, too powerful, it he took over me. Last term... when I wasn't myself, it was all because of him. I nearly lost my life during this past summer break because Sarah and Brandon had to save me. They had to do the sacred, and very secretive ritual to get rid of Herpo... forever."

A nervous hand ran through his dark tussled hair as he still looked to Amanda. "He was the cause of my violent outbursts and psychotic behavior. Constantly barading me in my mind and trying to take over. He needed a young body, and he needed me. Luckily Amanda... you weren't there to see my bahavior like those in my own house. My teammates got the worse of it." He gulped.

"I was gone. And the ritual to clear my soul of Herpo was successful. Though there was a price to pay." He said slowly as his royal blue eyes downcasted. Unsure of how to break it to her, he managed to take a deep breath before laying the big part of the story to Amanda. "I died. I died probably for a few minutes, but I was there, just watching my drowned body in Loch Ness being pulled out by Brandon."

Dead. He was partially dead, but he was on some astro-plane. Limbo. And Nathaniel wasn't all too sure, but his only comfort came from Griselda. "I was brought back to life by Sarah, and Herpo... he was taken away by Griselda, his wife, a ghost now who can live in peace. My great great... something great grandmother. However, Herpo isn't around anymore, and never shall he be in my future either."

[amandalarsen]

Amanda bit down on her bottom lip. She felt that she still could have helped him in any way. But for her safety? What did he mean? Especially from himself? Did that mean he would have caused a threat to her or Alessa? She didn't know the whole story, but she wanted to. That is what she is here for, right? This is what he is going to tell her? The whole story.

The night pressed on them as the shadows on the grounds shifted along with the moon. It must have been half an hour since they were there in the garden, talking, and such. She listened intently to him, afraid, nervous, and helpless to what has happened to him. This Herpo was a terrible tyrant and Nathaniel had suffered enough.

But what caught her off guard the most was the part of Nathaniel dying. He died to save his own soul by the hands of his own friend. And her lips quivered as tears brimmed her sapphire eyes. She could have lost Nathaniel. Both her and Alessa could have lost him to Herpo. And she choked. Amanda couldn't imagine losing Nathaniel, ever. And a part of her broken down.

She was silent throughout his story-telling. Still trying to understand all that has happened. And she could invision it in her mind. Nathaniel under water, trying to save his own life, and fighting against this man. Amanda never experienced losing someone until now. It was all too hard to intake. This information on the ritual and Nathaniel's life. And Herpo...

What has the world done to you my friend?
Will things ever be the same?

Her hand gripped more firmly over Nathaniel's, trying to strike up some courage in herself to say something. But he was good now? His life was free of this dark wizard. Though, what now? How could she act normal around him when he almost lost his life? "Nathaniel..." She whispered as she scooted closer to him. "I... well.. you're here with us now. And I... oh Nathaniel." Her arms embraced him.