Post by lys on Dec 9, 2007 12:17:25 GMT -5
Reserved for Ranka Molohov
We write our prayers on a little bomb,
Kiss it on the face and send it to God.
Legs swung freely back and forth, not quite touching the water. The chilled wind caused ripples to echo throughout the liquid and freeze the bodies of any human being outside. The temperature was unknown to Lysander; the most he knew was that it was cold, nothing more. A black hoodie with white decor was on the upper part of his body, falling down to mid-thigh where his pants were seen. Just black jeans, slightly baggy. The beige-tan bag he always carried around sat by his side, a sketch pad in his hands, gray mechanical pencil hovering above a blank page.
Still bloodshot eyes stared, blank. He was waiting. Just... waiting, for that one girl from the Library. Ranka. That sketch he had drawn was finished though he touched it up some, just to be a bit more presentable. Would she like it? And would she pose for him again? He shifted, eyes drifting upward and across the lake, half-lidded. For a few minutes, that was all he did. His own mind was a blank, useless sheet. Nothing would come of it.
His fingers twitched and he re-directed his gaze at the sketch pad. He moved the pencil out of the way and left his hand to hover above the page. A breath was taken and he flipped the pages, ending on the very last one. On it was a detailed sketch of a woman laying in a hospital bed, a smile spread on her lips, head cocked to the side. The tips of his fingers traced the lines, memorizing every detail. Gone. The hand holding the pencil curled into a fist and he bowed his head.
After a long silent moment he snapped the pad close, not wanting to stare at that sketch any longer. It did nothing but turn his insides anymore. But it was a memento and he would never get rid of it. However, right before that picture was a missing page, one of which he had ripped out and stuffed in a box somewhere. It was an older one of mother, father and himself- a family that was barely ever around. One was deceased and the other might as well be dead. Father...
Lysander's eyes darkened, his grip on the pencil tightening. A moment later he forced himself to relax, closing his eyes, and falling back into his waiting mode. After all, what else could he do but wait? Ranka. That's what he had to think about. Nothing else. Nothing sad. He was going to see someone today and he couldn't be depressed. You're not allowed to break. Not yet. No. Tighter his brows pulled together, lids pressed hard to one another. I hate you almost as much as I hate myself, father.
You're not allowed to break.